Dear Change Leader,
“How do you keep going when everything feels impossible?“
This question has been on my mind in recent weeks as I’ve listened to leaders describe their experience of this moment. The challenges feel relentless. The uncertainty seems endless. And many of you are wondering how to sustain your energy and clarity when there’s no clear end in sight.
It brings me back to my university years in South Africa, starting in 1986, when apartheid was still in force. Those were dark times—states of emergency, brutal crackdowns, and what felt like an intractable system of oppression.
I was privileged to meet and work alongside long-time anti-apartheid activists—people who had been in the struggle for social justice since the 1960s and 1970s. These were people who had faced detention and imprisonment, exile, and the constant threat of harassment and violence. And yet they continued their work, year after year, decade after decade.
What struck me most wasn’t their anger about apartheid or their tactics they employed against it—it was their capacity to maintain hope and lift up those around them, even in the face of seemingly impossible odds.
They understood something essential about sustaining themselves and their communities through prolonged difficulty: personal resilience isn’t about pushing through at all costs. It’s about building the inner resources that allow you to stay present, purposeful, and connected to others for the long haul.
The Foundation of Lasting Resilience
Personal resilience—your individual capacity to reset and reground after shocks—rests on three interconnected pillars that those activists embodied so powerfully:
Mental Flexibility and Adaptive Thinking The most resilient leaders I observed didn’t cling rigidly to how things “should” work. Instead, they developed what I now recognize as cognitive agility—the ability to hold multiple perspectives simultaneously, to question their own assumptions, and to find creative pathways when traditional routes were blocked.
They practiced what we might call “strategic acceptance”—fully acknowledging difficult realities while refusing to be defeated by them. This wasn’t passive resignation but active engagement with what was actually happening, rather than what they wished were happening.
Emotional Regulation and Self-Awareness These leaders had learned to recognize their emotional patterns and develop healthy ways to process intensity. They understood that leading others through difficulty required first tending to their own emotional landscape.
They practiced what felt to me like emotional honesty—they didn’t pretend everything was fine, but they also didn’t let their emotions drive their decisions. They created space between feeling and reacting, which allowed them to respond thoughtfully even under pressure.
Clarity About Personal Purpose and Values Perhaps most importantly, they maintained an unshakeable connection to why their work mattered. This wasn’t abstract idealism—it was a lived understanding of their role in something larger than themselves. Even when specific strategies failed or progress seemed impossible, their core purpose remained intact.
This clarity became their North Star, helping them make difficult decisions and inspiring others to continue when the path forward was unclear.
Building Your Own Resilience Foundation
The challenges you’re facing as a leader today may be different from those faced by the activists I knew, but the principles remain remarkably similar. Here are three practices to strengthen your personal resilience for whatever lies ahead:
Develop Your Inner Observer
Create regular moments—even just five minutes daily—to step back and notice what’s happening inside you. What thoughts are running on repeat? What emotions are present? Where do you feel tension in your body?
This isn’t about judgment or immediate change—it’s about developing awareness. The simple act of observing creates space between you and your reactive patterns, giving you more choice in how you respond to challenges.
Practice Strategic Perspective-Taking
When facing a difficult situation, deliberately shift your viewpoint. Ask yourself: “How might this look different in six months? What would someone I respect advise? What opportunities might be hidden in this challenge?”
This isn’t about toxic positivity or denying real difficulties. It’s about training your mind to see beyond the immediate crisis to possibilities that might not be immediately visible.
Reconnect with Your Core Purpose
Schedule time monthly to reflect on why your leadership matters – not just what you’re trying to accomplish professionally, but how your work connects to something meaningful beyond yourself. What impact do you want to have on the people you lead? What kind of organization do you want to help create?
When you’re clear about your deeper purpose, daily frustrations and setbacks become part of a larger story rather than evidence of failure.
Your Resilience Development Path
This week, I invite you to begin with just one small step:
- Choose one of these three practices and commit to it for the next two weeks. Set a specific time and method—perhaps five minutes of inner observation each morning, or a weekly purpose reflection session.
But here’s something crucial: personal resilience isn’t actually an individual process—it benefits most from a collective approach! The activists I knew in South Africa didn’t build their resilience in isolation. They supported each other, shared their struggles, and held each other accountable to their deeper purpose.
- Consider finding one or two trusted colleagues—whether peers, mentors, or team members—with whom you can share this journey. Check in with each other weekly about what you’re noticing, what’s challenging, and what’s helping. Sometimes simply naming your struggles to someone who understands can be profoundly grounding.
Notice what shifts, both in yourself and in your relationships. Pay attention not just to how you feel, but to how your presence affects those around you. Resilient leaders create ripple effects of stability and hope, even in unstable times.
Your leadership journey may feel overwhelming right now, but remember: others have faced seemingly impossible circumstances and not only survived but created lasting change. The key wasn’t superhuman strength—it was the patient cultivation of inner resources that could sustain them during the long journey of change.
I’d love to hear how this work unfolds for you. What practice are you choosing? What are you discovering about your own resilience patterns? Feel free to reply to this email and share what’s on your mind—I read every response!
Until next time,
Develop Your Pathfinder Leadership Skills
Are you ready to strengthen your ability to navigate uncertain terrain with confidence?
I’m excited to announce an upcoming program specifically designed for change leaders facing today’s unprecedented challenges. The Pathfinder’s Journey: Leading Through Uncertainty will provide you with practical frameworks, peer support, and expert guidance to help you:
- Develop a keen sense for assessing changing organizational terrain
- Build adaptive decision-making skills for rapidly shifting environments
- Create teams that can respond with agility to unexpected challenges
- Maintain your leadership presence and well-being during prolonged uncertainty
Program details are being finalized, but spaces will be limited.
If you’re curious about this opportunity, please click the button below to join the interest list. There’s no obligation, but if you’d like to be among the first to receive information when applications open, click the button below.
Those on the interest list will also receive a complimentary copy of my article “Leading Like A Gardener” – a practical resource to support your leadership journey.
I look forward to sharing more details soon!
EFFECTIVE CHANGE RESULTS FROM INTENTIONAL LEADERSHIP
We’re a leadership and organization development consultancy. My team and I work with leaders like you to prepare for and lead successful change processes.
Here’s why our clients call us:
- Leadership Coaching: I support leaders as they navigate transitions into new roles or expanded responsibilities.
- Group Coaching and Learning Programs: Bringing groups of leaders together, I facilitate learning experiences and months-long programs that equip people to be effective change leaders.
- Effective Teams and Stronger Organizations: I work with leaders and their teams with tailored processes that increase their effectiveness, building layers of aligned teams that transform organizations.